Life Coaching Sydney: The Silent Killer of Your Dreams and Goals

Hi there,

Patrick here again from Life Coaching Sydney…I have a new article for you today and it deals with the most unconscious barrier that almost everyone faces but few recognize…

Someone once asked me —What do you think is the biggest killer of people‘s dreams and goals?“ My first thought was, as I pondered on the answer, that people are too caught up in their day to day life (paying bills, the mortgage etc), instead of focusing on designing their ultimate life. Most people are caught up in surviving vs. living their ultimate life.

(…and by the way that’s where a life coach can assist with some great life coaching strategies…)

As I thought that, I asked myself a new question: —What ultimately stops people from realizing their goals?“ And then it hit me. People don‘t achieve them because of one thing, and it‘s a very sneaky one. Most people don‘t even realize that it‘s happening. It‘s called resistance.

What is resistance?

Have you ever experienced a time when, you set a goal or a new year‘s resolution, and when you set it you were really excited and couldn‘t wait to have it realized? And the first few days or weeks you actually followed through, you did go to the gym three times a week, you started to eat healthier or you stopped smoking. And then out of no where, you just woke up one day and didn‘t feel like going to the gym or doing that morning walk.

Well, there you go. You experienced resistance.

But then you rationalized it, which what resistance wants you to do, so that you don‘t change. Rationalization is our way of trying to feel better about our resistance. Typical one‘s are —I don‘t have the time“ —I‘ll do it later“ —I don‘t have the money“ —It‘s not that important“ etc. Another example of resistance is when you just don‘t feel like picking up the phone and making that call you know is important.

(Now for those of you who really want to go beyond this, I recommend you come for a free life coaching session with me Patrick – Life Coaching Sydney. You’ll walk away from this session with a new awareness, clarity and strength that will let you know exactly what steps you need to take to create the results you want. You can book by filling in form to the right.)

Resistance is when you start a new project and feel totally excited about it and then somewhere…

…in the middle you lost your enthusiasm. Another classical example is when someone tells us to do something, which could lead to an immediate feeling of resistance. How do you feel when someone tells you that you ”have to‘ or you ”must do‘ this or that? You would probably say ”No freaking way‘.

And this is what most people do to themselves every single day and then wonder why they can‘t reach their goals or desires. Think about this, when you tell yourself —I have to go to the gym“ or —I must pay my bills“ or —I should not smoke anymore“.

(Side note: And in my experience some people who would like to find a life coach never get around doing it, not even when they have an opportunity to experience life coaching for free. Unfortunately that’s how strong resistance can be, usually until someone has experienced enough paid or suffering.)

How do you think that will make you feel?

Not that good I would assume. And if you did say to yourself —I must not smoke anymore“ you probably would end up smoking even more. How can I recognize resistance in my own life? Resistance can be very subtle; you might forget to do things that are important to you. You might watch TV instead of doing another presentation to a prospective client. This is called procrastination, just another form of resistance.

You might have to talk to your boss about a pay increase but fear sets in so you don‘t. Fear is also another form of resistance. Resistance comes in many forms. The feeling of resistance could be described as —pushing against“ or —I can‘t“ or —moving forward with the brakes on“. These are just some examples of how it can feel. You can have resistance towards objects, situations, people, events, things people say or do etc.

Have you ever met someone you just didn‘t want to talk to or be in their company? Or you might have a friend who you don‘t like to hang out with that much? That‘s resistance.

Why should you feel excited about resistance?…Read in the next post which will be part two of this article series.

Hope you enjoyed this and looking forward to seeing you in the next article or in a complimantery session.

Best regards,

Patrick (International Trainer/Master Coach – Life Coach Sydney)

Sydney

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